Come Back to Me

Come Back to me
By Patricia Ang

“Come back to me, with all your heart. Don’t let fear keep us apart.” As I sang the lyrics from the song Hosea, I can’t help recalling how indeed I strayed and returned back to Lord.

In the parable of the prodigal son, the man has 2 sons. The younger son asked the father for his inheritance. The father divided the wealth among them and the younger son chose to leave (Luke 11-12). After the younger son had squandered his wealth, he chose to return back to his father. The father, despite what the son had done, welcomed him home with open arms.

Have we ever been like the prodigal son, thinking that the grass is always greener on the other side, we wander off away from God? Every person has the right to say to God ‘Leave me alone. Don’t bother about me.’ (Revelation 3:20)

Yet our Lord, who loves us so much, waits patiently for our return. He is like the shepherd that seeks to find the missing lamb that strayed off from the herd. Our Lord Jesus is the great shepherd of the sheep (Heb13:20). He saw us as “sheep without a shepherd. He came to seek and to save those who were lost (Luke 19:10).

In the parable of the lost sheep (Matthew 18:12-14), it is said that the shepherd will leave ninety-nine sheep on the hills and go to look for the one that had wandered off. He is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. In the same way, Our Father is not willing to let any one of us be lost.

As I reflected on both the parables, I must confess that I too, am one of those lost sheep. Baptised at the age of 5, I didn’t know much of the catholic faith even though I attended a catholic primary school. As a teenager, it did not help in my faith as I did not attend a catholic secondary school, neither did I attend Sunday school.

When I started working, my faith in God took a nose-dived. I blamed my family for not giving me a chance to choose my religion. When people asked what was my religion, I just kept quiet. There was a period of time, I did not attend the Catholic church. Instead I attended my friend’s Methodist Church.

It took me a while to go back to church. At that time, I was pursing my studies, and I recalled the church advertising the first Alpha course. I could not make it for that course, but somehow the alpha course was on my mind. When the second Alpha course came about, I was glad I was able to sign up for it.

As a guest in Alpha2, I had the opportunity to know people and of which a few of them are my good friends now. It was the prayers and fellowship that bonded us together. Someone told me, when I was a guest in alpha, I was very aloof and distanced. At that time, I was facing several issues in my which I did not know how to deal with it. I was not receptive during this alpha course.

After the Alpha 2 course, someone submitted my name to Spotlight to be a writer and there I slowly began writing articles. Subsequently, I also went on to help out in Alpha 4, 5, 10 and 11. My turning point in my faith was in Alpha 4 during the Holy Spirit weekend. As host of the group, we need facilitate and lead in group discussions. Hence every week, I diligently did my preparations and I started praying daily for our guests and all who were involved in the alpha course. Gradually I realised became less self-centred and cared more about other people. It is about serving the Lord. As I seek him, He in turn guids me to the faith. The Holy Spirit weekend for Alpha 4 was a turning point, as I surrendered all the hurts that was within me, peace just fell within me. From that own day onwards, each Holy Spirit weekend has been eye-opener to me and it is always a humbling experience.

By then, I was just awed by the Lord’s presence as I accepted Him back to my life. As I wanted to know more about him, He leads friends to show me the faith, books to read up on and courses to attend. It was only in 2007, was I finally a confirmed Catholic. I am now proud to say I am so thankful to know Jesus.

It has now been 4 years as a writer for Spotlight and this year I also volunteered to be a contributor for Oxygen (http://thecatholicwriter.com/oxygen). This is a reflection on the daily readings which we as contributors take turns to reflect upon. It has been a joy for me just writing for the Lord and I thank Him for his grace and blessing for this gift of writing. I also thank the Lord for his patience for waiting for me to come back to him.

“I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit: for without Me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)